Day 39

"This Wind Blows"

Miles biked: 72

Hello from St. Francis, Kansas! While riding through the beautiful Kansas headwind, Gizmo uddered the words "this wind blows" an thus a blog headline is created. Today marked the final day of Kansikah and there is cheerfulness in the air as people plan their last presents. Claire, who is not a very big drinker got a beer bong. Nick Krug was presented with a collection of small toys and an Elvis poster. I recieved a homemade sprite hat that I remember being for sale in an antique store in Gypsum. The excitement has continued throughout the day. The end of this great Holiday means we have also reached the very end of Kansas and as beautiful as the country side can be....I believe everyone will jump for joy when they see the Colorado sign tomorrow. I think a few may even make love to the sign. Today's ride took us 35 miles north of Colby, and then 50 miles straight West. I have decided to move to Kansas and run for Governor with a promise to build a new and exciting road system.....it will be called: THE DIAGONAL ROAD....GENIUS!

Today I realized I had major sleep deprivation and stopped in every single town between Colby and St. Francis....which was 2. The first was the town of Alwood 30 miles into the ride. There was a block in the downtown that had speakers and played country music outside the buildings at all hours of the day. We stopped at a doughnut shop and were asked by everyone we saw where we were going. I don't think they get very many outsiders.

Our next stop was thanks to mother nature. About 15 miles outside of our last location we could see a large thunderstorm brewing and heading in our direction. We sat and pondered if we should try and beat the storm, or stop in the town we were currently in. Apparently God heard us, and a crack of lighting followed by an ear deafening boom crashed within a mile of us. We stopped in the town of BIRD CITY! The school mascot for the highschool was the Cougars which made no sense to me. I was thinking more along the lines of Hawks or Eagles. We sat in a Cafe to wait for the storm to pass where some old locals told me the town was named after the the famous sea Admiral....Admiral Bird.
Local: Did they teach you about Admiral Bird in school?
Me: Ummm....I don't think so

I then asked a man how big St. Francis was and he said "14".....so I asked in shock "people?" He answered back in more shock..."no 1,400 people". Trust me when I say it is believable to think there is a town with 14 people around here.

Today's conversation mostly had to do with Chiggers. Chiggers are microscopic bugs that live in the grass.....then climb on you and eat away at your flesh. While I haven't had any Chiggers, I have had plenty of bugs jump up from the grass and stick to my arm and leg hair.

Well this is it....Goodbye Kansas.....Hello Colorado and the West!

Day 36,37,38

Rough Days

Miles biked: 81
86
66
Our trip has had a horrible accident. About 9 miles outside of Luray, Kansas one of our riders was hit by a car. It was a very scary day, and continues to be a scary recovery. He was transfered to Wichita and will remain there for the next couple of weeks. The good news is he continues to get better everyday and make progress and my prayers are with him and his family.

We sat in Luray almost in shock. The next day, 11 of us decided to ride, 5 had left the night before to go to the hospital, and the rest decided to clear their mind in the van.

The trip to hill city was a hot one. The thermometer hit 103.....there were two banks on the way in......one had an eletrical sign that said 109....the other 111. To top things off, the headwinds were blowing very hard, making each pedal stroke impossible. In Hill City, the entire group went to the municiple pool to cool off and just hang out together. I challenged Gizmo to a diving board competition, in which I of course was the winner. Pat went down the pretty impressive waterslide about 400 times to try and get as much leverage on turn #2 as possible. He even had personal advice from life guards and 14 year old boys ( and a 6 year old). I was impressed with the progress he made. Later that day I watched a man walk his dog with his car. He let the dog out of the door in a park. Sat there as the dog ran around.....beeped the horn....and the dog ran back to the car. I thought the dog was going to get in the car, but instead the car drove slowly down the street as the dog followed! Very strange. At night the 5 in Wichita came back which feels pretty good to have everyone back on the trip.

Today's trip was a vacation......only 66 miles. More people joined us on the bikes and now we are in Colby Kansas. The hills have dissintegrated and now we are in the Midwest I have stereotyped in my head. There are endless corn fields in all directions. Today we did get a chance to celebrate as Granpa Sam turned 25. We honored him with a shrek themed birthday party and a Hanah Montanah singing card. We have one more day in the state of Kansas, can't wait to see a chance of scenery.

I hope all are well and are staying as safe as possible.

Day 35

Humans awake before 6am?

Miles biked: 87

Hello from Gypsum, Kansas! Population 413. Today's ride led us out of the great city of Emporia through more rolling hills of Kansas. On HBC we have now agreed to stop listening to locals who say "oh, once you go a little west, it will be flat". We've been hearing that since St Louis!

Today's wakeup call was at the ungodly hour of 4:30am. Last night someone said wake up call was at 4:30 and I laughed at them. I really thought it was a joke until Andy was staring down at me this morning. I really wasn't sure if I was going to be able to function but I realized it was actually better than waking up later. I was in such a comatos for the first 30 miles, before it hit me I was on a bike in Kansas I only had 50 miles left! Plus we beat the heat which reached 95 today and is supposed to be 97 tomorrow!

Today we drove by some fun town names. We started by going through Americus. The day was later spent going by Manhattan and Tampa. I personally wanted to stop in Tampa.....but the 90 degree heat without the ocean just wasn't worth it. Half way through the trip we stopped at a bakery in the town Council Bluffs. Lisa found a pamphlet that said "Corey" and was so excited that it matched Corey Morenz she screamed a profanity. I looked around the bakery at the crowd of women and children that crowded the tables.

As we came down a hill at mile 60 or so I saw a dump truck coming off a gravel road. The truck waited for awhile looking at us, seeming to wait for us to pass. As Nick, Colin, Lisa and I came within a few hundred yards, the truck pulled out releasing a dirt cloud behind it. The only problem was that the cloud of brown and black was not dirt....but cow menure. I immediatley looked back at Colin and Lisa who both looked as if they were going to fall off their bikes, vomit, and die from the stench. I thought their look was so funny that I broke into uncontrolable laughter. As I became short of breath from laughing I would suck in air filled with the stench of hundreds of pounds of rotting cow crap, which almost made me pass out as well. Oh Kansas......

Pat got his shirt washed last night, although he still made me smell it this morning, and it still kinda smelled like urine. According to the Pastor of this church 30% of the people of Gypsum are retired, 30% work in factories, and another 30% collect welfare. The town has three stores....a Cafe, a general store kinda thing, and an antiques store. The guy at the antique store was so happy I spent $2 on a shot glass (present for Kanikah). I think I may have single handedly raised his profts 200%. There is also a gas station that is only open when the owner feels like working. According to one local, if it is a good fishing day, don't expect it to be open. That is my kinda gas station......where do I sign up?

So I'm off to Lucas Kansas or Luray (the name is being debatted before me by Morgen and Lisa). According to the locals......it gets flatter from here....but please..... refer to my opening paragraph!

Day 33+34

Smell my Jersey

Miles biked: 85
0

Hello from Emporia, Kansas! The home of our rest day and our 4th of July celebrations! I certainly need the rest after about 250 miles of biking in three days! We have moved out of the flooded farms of Iola and biked to a town that has over 25,000 people. At this point in the trip it feels like New York City. Yippie!

In my last post I mentioned we were going to the Iola airport. After I blogged that day, we ate dinner with the church and were shipped to a small airport on the outskirts of the city. I don't think anyone was ready for what awaited us. The church had arranged for us to have free rides in these crazy parachute fan flying machines! The "aircraft" looked like go carts with a huge fan attached to the back and a large parachute that hovered above it. Everyone got the chance to ride at heights of over 600 feet above the ground. Some, like Pat, had adventurous pilots who chased after Deer and coyotes. I had more of a standard flight that was really amazing!

The next day as we awoke in the church, Pat Muha was drawing attention. I walked over and Pat demanded I smell his jersey. I reluctantly agreed. The smell was horrible! It reeked of a very strong scent of urine! We are all convinced it was a failed Kaniska gift. In any event, it did not stop Pat from throwing the jersey on and wearing it for 85 miles. When he arrived in Emporia he had symtoms of Uritoxication.(sickness from smelling urine too long)

At the start of the day I decided to celebrate the Holiday in style. I wore a 4th of July bow tie, pinned a flag to my back, and had mini flags hanging on my bike and helmet. It seemed to get a positive response on the road. About 45 miles into the journey we came across the small town of Gridley, which had shut down their "Main Street" and had a couple of tents and activities. I bought a hat, played some bachi, ate a chili dog, walked past the car show, and watched some motorcyclist awe the small crowd with wheelies. I have decided I have never felt more American than celebrating the 4th with the town of Gridley Kansas. Some little girls even asked if they could have their picture with me and Gizmo.....HBC-ers have become such celebrities.

The ride into Emporia was easier for me than most. More than half the group took a wrong turn on Highway 99 and rode anywhere from 90-111 miles compared to my 85! Corey walked in after 106 miles with a smile on his face. "I got to do a century on the 4th!" I was happy with the bare minimum. On my ride in I passed a meat factory and almost got giddy when I saw the cows in the final pen before entering the "chopping block". Poor cows.....but I think everyone should be able to see where meat actually comes from. It does not smell pretty. Last night we HBC style celebrated the 4th by sneaking over to a dog park and lighting off illegal fireworks that I bought in Missouri. I bought a $25 pack called the Pyro-Predator which entertained us. Throughout the night there were fireworks being lit from all directions. We were also given one of the most beautiful sun sets I've ever seen! The night ended by most of HBC dancing and singing in the church parking lot to "I would bike 4,000 miles" (instead of I would walk 500 miles).

On my day off today I was able to help lead a bike clinic at a local day camp. The funny thing was none of the kids had bikes, so Corey, Lisa, Beth and I made up a relay race to entertain the youth of Emporia. I'm not sure when I'll get a chance to blog again since I'll be in the middle of nowhere Kansas. Make sure to light off all of your extra fireworks and think of the pyro-predator and me!

Day 31 + 32

Happy Kansikah (pernounced Chansukah....or close to Hanukah)

Miles biked: 82
81

Hello fromm 22 inches of rain Iola Kansas! It appears someone has done something very wrong around here, and God dumped 22 inches of rain on the town in three days! I was never a very religous man, but after staying in all these churches I have decided it is def. God's fault I had to smell the stench of stagnate water for most of my 80 miles of biking today. Half of the town we are staying in was forced to leave by the government. Although, I must say.....while I did see plenty of flooded farms.....no floating cows. Maybe they sink.

Today marks the first day of Kaniskah (chan-su-kah). Apparently Kansas sucks so much to bike through our leaders have declared the entire state a holliday......The leaders made everyone pick a name out of hat....and until we leave the state in 7 days....we must buy presents for our person(secret santa style). Today I recieved a key chain from my mystery giver that said "I'm not that girl....yet" It is proudly hanging on my camelbak for everyone to see.

Yesterday was our last day in Mizzilly. I have decided I never ever want to live in Missouri. While deciding 6 months ago on what I should be doing with my life....biking sounded better than "real world". Now I realize it is a great experience to find out exactly where I never want to go again. While everyone was extremely nice.....I just can't picture myself living in a place with town after town with a population under 200 people.

The hills of CT, the appalachians, the rolling hills of PA and WV, the roller coaster of Kentucky and the Ozarks of MO are now behind us. According to all who have ever been through the state of KS.....the hills are truly behind us. Now all that lies ahead is some little tiny bump called the rocky Mts. How hard can it be? The leaders keep down playing the difficulty of the rockies although I'm not sure how you downplay 37 miles of straight climbing in one day. I think I will enjoy Kansas while I can.

In two days we have biked over 160 miles. My legs feel like Jello...and I am told we will have another 80 miles tomorrow. According to the pastor there will be some sort of plane ride tonight. In Camdenton we stayed at a Church camp. I decided to go swimming with Lisa, Ali, and Liana in the pool. We got permission to swim even though campers littered the pool. While I was still doing 360 degree cannonballs off the diving board...a camp director came up to the girls and made them put shirts over their sport bras. The main benefactor of their "indecency" was me.....as he handed me a free T-shirt as well just so I wouldn't be left out. The night was spent sleeping in old cabins with beds before we headed out today!

Today I rode with an array of HBC riders. Apparently up ahead of me as I neared the state border...Sam and Andy decided to bike naked across a river called something along the name of "Dryhard creek". I passed them as they were putting their clothes back on. Moments later a call came to Andy from Emma.....who was standing at the state border ahead with 4-6 state police officers. Half were from Missouri, and half were from Kansas. All were looking for two "naked bikers". Apparently someone called the state police and said they almost "ran off the road" when seeing Sam and Andy. I think I would come to a near crash after being blinded by the whitness of Andy and Sam's Ass myself! In the end no one was arrested, the Kansas State Police just asked Emma to tell the rest of HBC to "Keep it on in Kansas" which I think is a wonderful state motto!

So......after 6 days of straight rain, it is wonderful to have a second straight day of dry biking! It is even more exciting to see that the town of Iola did not float away. Tomorrow is the 4th of July and I plan to put as many decorations on my bike as humanly possible! Go see some fireworks! (I bought $25 worth in MO called the Pyro Python)

Happy B-day America!

-Ben

Day 27,28,29, 30

Missouri is Mizilly (as in hilly)

Miles Biked: 0
80
65
60

Hello from Camdenton, Missouri! We are now well into the "show me state" even though I have no clue what that state motto means. The last few days have brought adventures as we had to cross swinging bridges, cross unfinished bridges, and somehow Gizmo built a personal bridge for a stray dog to our van.......and now we have a dog.....ah yes......Missouri.....

My day off in St. Louis brought me to all parts of the city. For being the "gateway to the west" I was expecting a little more. There were no cabs, very few city buses, and one metro line. The city seemed to be built in blotches. The Downtown was not very close to the Universities. The Park was not close to the cool shopping. The cool shopping was not close to the downtown and so forth. I'm not sure who decided on the urban development of the city, but they should consider change. In St Louis I got new gloves, checked out the arch, walked 47 miles, and slept. The real excitement came the next day on our trip to NEW HAVEN!

That's right. New Haven Missouri.......home of the shamrocks......and nothing else. Population 600. No Pepe's. No Toads. No nothing. Just 600 Irish loving folk. We showered at the municipal pool which made me wonder why Morris CT, population of over 2,000 does not have a Municipal pool! There was even a water slide (that was 7 feet long). I got a hair cut, went with shopping crew to the market (no super), and called it a night.

The next days travel brought us into the foothills of the Ozarks. Remember that time I typed in my blog "the hills are behind us"?...........I lied. Steep, curvy, rolling hills greeted us as we approached Rte D. As we came to Route D a large sign exclaimed "Detour: Bridge out". With a quick phone call to Miriam in the van she told us that the groups in front of us decided they would try and cross the river. As I biked down the road to the tiny river, I looked ahead as I saw HBC bikers tight rope walking an unfinished bridge that was 25 feet or so above the water. The bikers were going across on skinny steel beams, bike and equipment in hand, screaming like school girls the whole way. I decided that the high road was not for me....took off my jersey.......hoped off my bike......and dove into the creek/river/watery thing. The water was just low enough for me to carry everyone's bikes to the otherside. I enjoy low risk decisions with the same result and so did the other 20 bikers behind me. We started a river crossing that rivaled some I had completed in my days in the 5th grade playing "Oregon Trail" the computer game. Somewhere along the way Andrea decided she did not want to get wet and paid a river crossing fee of $5 to Francis who happily put her on his back and dragged her across. Gizmo thought it would be a great idea to try and throw his shoes across........which was a horrible idea. He threw them........they landed 3/4 of the way.....and then he left them there. After 15 minutes he finally made his way to the other side.....where he could only find one shoe. I'm not sure why he didn't realize bike shoes sink. Anywho........Corey offered to find his shoe for a River drudging fee of $25. Gizmo agreed and Corey found it at the bottom of the clay river in minutes. The lessons learned at the end of the day.......the low road is so much more fun. The road winded up and down to Vienna......population 600. Morgen and I gave an amazing slideshow in front of an audience that didn't really care.....but made a great "Welcome Habitat Riders" sign out front.

Today Andy led us down a terrific road in the middle of nowhere called "Swinging Bridges". I had a feeling the road would be interesting when I realized the road was unmarked and was unpaved. On the route were two steel cable bridges. Just as I approached them, the van arrived and decided to zoom across the bridges even though the van was most likely over the weight limit and several wooden planks were loose or missing off the second bridge. It was something straight out of Indiana Jones. Somehow the van crossed unscathed, with all passengers still alive. Today marked the 6th straight day of rain......which sucks to bike in. I just received word that the town we are supposed to bike to in two days, Iola Kansas, is under a mandatory flood evacuation. Can;t wait to find out how the leaders work that one out. Sooooooo........coming into the state of Missouri I had no idea what it would look like.......and being in the state several days....I'm still don't know what to think....and continue to ask myself..."what the hell does the Show Me state mean?"

Hope all is well!

Day 21,22,23,24,26

You Can Find me in St Louis!

Miles Biked: Alot

Hello from the gateway to the west....St Louis Missouri! Since the last time I've written in here we've gone through three states in 6 days! The hills are behind us, and a whole crap load of corn is in front. Welcome to the Midwest!

Louisville Kentucky almost seemed like day off. After a quick 40 mile bike ride (that Miriam said would be 20) I tried my luck with several HBC-ers at Churchhill Downs...the horse racing track home to the kentucky derby. I lost $6 on two races, but it was worth the $2 price of admission just to see horse jockeys up close in person. I am convinced there is a jockey farm somewhere in South America that produces these amazing small creatures. At night we all partied in club 113.....which is not a club, but a dorm room at the University of Louisville. I relived my days of living in the dorms and then it was time to leave the bluegrass state and hit up Indiana.

So no one told me.....but Indiana has hills. Not mountains, but I was surprised that I was rising and falling. We biked through the rolling hills of Indiana to our destination of Saint Meinrad. The town has a population of 800, but the Abbey was the size of Westminster Abbey. The day brought on our first bit of hard rain. So our wet shammy's (butt padding) were ecstatic to reach something with a roof. I'm not sure if I saw any monks, but I did see lots of old people. I keep asking myself if organized religion will be around in 40 years. Everyone seems to be 60 or above in these churches.

From Meinrad we biked through torrential down pours to the town of New Harmony. The rain took out my cell phone (although it seems to be breathing life today). New Harmony lies in the middle of no where, yet holds millions of dollars worth of fine art. We were given a tour of the town by the 93 year old widow of one of the towns earliest decedents. She is solely responsible for bringing in the kinds of art work the town has......and will talk you ear off about anything and everything seen in the town. Although New Harmony was beautiful, it creeped me out. I passed through several poor farming towns before reaching it, and it was out of place. So I was happy to move on to Thompsonville, Illinois.......population under 800.

Thompsonville sits also in the middle of nowhere......and thanks to Miriams route......we ended up on gravel roads for 10-15 miles. Gravel roads and road bikes don't go well together. The terrain was so rough I lost my brand new camera and passport (only form on ID) somewhere along the route. Corey put it best while biking when he said "I feel like I'm in a third world country! The roads were littered with stray dogs and even an angry hawk! Upon arrival the pastor took us all out to eat at a BBQ place on his bill.....I don't even want to know what he spent.

From Thompsonville we were supposed to go camping.......however a nasty thunderstorm broke out, and Beth talked to a local police department, who apparently called a church, which is why we apparently stayed in a gym in Chester Illinois. Chester.....as I'm sure you know......is home to the creator of "Popeye" the cartoon. Corey traveled down to the Popeye museum in his time off, bought a hat, took off his shirt, and played the roll of Popeye (minus the spinach) for the rest of the day. The town was small and contained the worst smelling Dairy Queen in the country. It smelled of a mix between sweat, ash tray, and human feces. I passed on the ice cream.

That leads us to today! The ride took us through more corn fields to the banks of the Mississippi. I passed over well behind most of the group due to my 11 mile detour (took a wrong turn) and now I am hours away from giving my first HBC slide show! Sam, Colin, and Andy decided to bike across the Mississippi naked. I'm not sure how they avoided arrest. I on the the other hand prefer to bike fully clothed. Well I am being summoned to leave.....I hope all is well with everyone! Time to go explore ST LOUIS!!!!!!!!